
Well, we just returned from a family vacation to Disney World with my sister and her family and our parents. What a wonderful and exhausting time we had. I didn't know it until I read in a Working Mother Magazine last night that our holiday experience is part of a trend travel industry experts call "togethering" - vacationing with relatives or friends. I highly recommend this type of family gathering. Spending time with nieces, nephews, cousins, siblings, parents and grandparents is a great way to bond and feel more balanced.
The truth is I really needed a change of pace. Being a balance crusader (as much as I am passionate about it and love it) a working mom and a new puppy owner (that's a whole other story) can get overwhelming sometimes. In fact, it can be very easy to burnout doing what you love. So, being in the business of balance I pay close attention to any signs that I might be tipping into burnout.
For me the telltale signal is disengagement (and usually a cold). When I've got too much on my plate I start to go into avoidance and let things stack up around me...and I usually get a cold (a surefire sign I've not been taking care of myself). The good news is that I pay attention to these signals and make some changes to quickly rectify the situation. Things I do include taking a vacation, getting in more walks and trips to the gym, going to bed at 9 pm a couple of nights a week and connecting with my husband and girlfriends. Most importantly, I engage in activities that make me feel positive.
I know that many of you can relate to feeling on the edge...it just goes with the territory of working mom. When you feel overwhelmed, what techniques do you use to prevent burnout?
For additional ideas, this month's article presents five steps you can take you to create a more positive you and shift from feeling burned out to busy but balanced.
Cheers, L.

Feature Article: Five Steps to a More Positive You
by Lisa Martin, PCC
Do you want to feel great about yourself? Would you like to see all that you wish for come to fruition? Do you want to find the right balance? There's a secret weapon that will make it all happen-and it's You. The way you think about yourself will be your true ally in living an inspired and balanced life. Your ability to think positively and believe in yourself will form the cornerstone of your success. Here are five strategies to help you become your own champion.
1. Appreciate you
One way to develop a strong sense of self-contentment is to give yourself the gift of self-appreciation. Offer yourself the same respect and kindness you give to those you care deeply about. Treat yourself to favorite pastimes - great music, happy people, laughter.
2. Watch for negative self-talk
I've noticed that women, in particular, have a tendency to pick out, and pick on, the parts of themselves they like least. I can't tell you how many times I've heard women speak disparagingly about themselves: At the gym, a woman complains that she has a "jiggle butt." At a fundraiser for my son's school one woman tells
another, "I am such a bad mom. I bought a cake for the cake walk (a fundraising initiative) instead of making it myself."
Whether said as a joke or not, these self-deprecating words can be damaging when the negativity stems from a deeper sense of dissatisfaction with oneself. Oftentimes negative comments tossed off in jest can come from a much more disapproving inner dialogue than might be revealed at the gym or the school.
You may immediately relate to these examples and recognize this kind of behavior as your own, or you might not even know that you have negative conversations with yourself. Take the mirror test to find out: The next time you see your reflection in a mirror, notice whether or not your first thought is a complimentary or a critical one. If it's critical (and for many of us it will be), it's time to stop running yourself down. Focus, instead, on what you like about yourself.
3. Focus on your attributes
Being happy in your own skin means getting comfortable with who you are, the way you look and what you want out of life. Instead of focusing on what you don't like about yourself, do your best to honor and appreciate what makes you unique. Your smile. Your sense of humor. Do you have wonderful hair or fabulous cheekbones? Now go further. What qualities define you as a person?
What do you absolutely love about yourself? Is it your attitude? Resist the temptation to criticize yourself. This is a learned behavior and it can be unlearned with intentional action.
4. Don't apologize for your achievements
We have all achieved things in our lives, both big and small, personally and professionally. Often, though, negative self-talk will stop us from basking in the glow of our successes. You might find yourself saying, "Hey, that wasn't so great" or "I could have done it better" or "I didn't really deserve that." You have the power to shut down this negative self-talk by honoring and celebrating your achievements. When you give yourself permission to feel positive about your accomplishments and refuse to listen to that negative inner dialogue, you will feel pleased. Proudly share your wins, rather than apologize for them. You might even amaze yourself when triumphal words such as "I'm great at my job," "I am the best mother ever" or "I rock" roll off your tongue with hardly a thought. Watch how your confidence builds as you praise your wins.
5. Do the best you can
Your best is going to be different from situation to situation. It will change depending on how rested you feel, who is involved and where you might be. No matter what the circumstances, the most you can ask from yourself is to do your best... and then remember to acknowledge that what you've done is just that. Through this self-acknowledgment that you can be released from angst and regret, and possibly see the humorous side of things. This one action will contribute greatly to your sense of well-being.
Check Your Balance
Take a few minutes now to discover how you feel about yourself. List all your attributes, skills, talents and accomplishments. Do not list anything that's negative. Post this list and put it in a place where you can see it every day - your bathroom mirror. Review this list. Champion yourself on a daily basis and experience how you can talk yourself into a more positive you. Remember when you are feeling self-content there is an added benefit: you are more likely to feel generous and supportive of others and that is the ultimate reward.
Want to have me walk you through how to prevent burnout and be busy but balanced? Join me on March 22 at 5pmPT/8pm ET for the Success & Balance Teleforum™: Burnout to Balance - Work Less and Live More. Click here to register
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE? You can! Just please ask our permission first by sending an e-mail to laura@briefcasemoms.com. She'll give you a short bio to include at the end of the article.



About Lisa Martin
Lisa Martin, PCC, is the author of the acclaimed Briefcase Moms: 10 Proven Practices to Balance Working Mothers' Lives. She lives what she writes and talks about. Mother of a six year-old son, a certified executive coach with 20 years of corporate and entrepreneurial experience, and the founder and president of Briefcase Moms®, she is all too familiar with the tug-of-war and challenges of work-life balance. Lisa has helped thousands of career-oriented women and men define, establish and maintain work-life success via her proprietary learning systems - 90 Days to a Balanced Life and Briefcase Parent Solutions

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